MY MUM IS A GREAT WOMAN BUT MY WIFE ISN'T!

As human beings, from two different backgrounds, we are bound to have differences. It is important to note that it is VERY OKAY to disagree with each other and it is VERY OKAY to be unhappy about a few things that your spouse does. However, what is not okay is to begin to compare your spouse to other people, especially your Parents. 

When you have a very good relationship with your parents, sometimes, you automatically want your spouse to behave like them. For the ladies, you may be looking out for 'sweet Daddy' moments in your husband, while the men may be looking for 'your mum' (Sweet mother) in your wife.

Both ways, we are wrong!

I remember seeing a quote a while ago which was about comparing our behind the scenes to someone else's highlight and I thought to myself, this applies to marriage as well. Some of us compare our spouses 'behind the scenes' to our parents 'highlights' and this should not be.

We want a family man, husband, father, provider, best guy, go to person etc... We want a woman that can keep a home, a wife, a mother, a cook, a best friend, a prayer partner etc... All these things are possible but you  need to give your  spouse time.

Your parents didn't become all that they are overnight. God worked on them and they put in efforts daily until they became these people we admire so much. They went through a lot of 'agreeing to disagree' moments, unending compromises, deep sacrifices and an overdose of communication to become who they are today (the list is endless, because different strokes apply to different folks).

Can I shock you? Your parents are still learning how to be better to/for each other. Marriage is a University that one can never graduate from. There are things our parents will never tell us, and there are struggles they will never share with us. In the same vein, there are things we will never share with our kids.

Life is in stages, we learn, unlearn and relearn everyday. Please give your partner a breathing space. Support him/her by praying for them, and you will see results.

PS: We need to stop looking for our Fathers or Mothers in our partners, everyone is unique in their own way. There was something you saw in him/her in the beginning. Hold on to whatever it was/is, and help them build on it positively.

Oluwasade O.

Thank you for stopping by, and we will be back next week. Please feel free to leave a comment below, God bless you all.

OneLove,

SomzyBrown.