I came across a picture recently and the lady was asking about a guy she is in a relationship with who is so nice to her but a big time bully to his sister. She asked if she should run or maybe she is just over thinking things. See picture below.
Before we delve into this fully, I'ld like to say that relationships are very important and the way we treat family members, friends, colleagues matter a lot. It is not enough to look at how your boyfriend or girlfriend treats you. You need to open your eyes and mind to discover how he or she treats other people around him or her. How does he or she relate with his or her family members? How does she treat her friends? How does he treat his colleagues at work? How does she talk to her mentors? These and many more are the questions you need to sincerely and genuinely ask yourself when you're in a relationship.
It is important to take note of these things because the truth is that a person being nice and friendly to you alone poses a problem. It means that he would some day treat you the way he treats this other person or people. Do not be too blinded by love not to recognise the important things. You do not want to get into marriage and start wondering why you were not quick enough to spot a red flag.
Back to the above picture and question, the lady is asking if she should run...what do you think please?
Is it possible for him to be that way with his sister and never be that way to his girlfriend/fiance or wife when or if he finally gets married to her? In my opinion, the chances are high that when he gets married to her (if he does), he'll treat her the same way he treats his sister now. She is just his girlfriend now so that part of him might not be evident towards her but the moment they are in the same space and he feels he is in control, there is a high probability that he would maltreat her or abuse her.
There are a lot of people undergoing abuse today and many are scared to leave or run away. They suffer in silence and cannot even talk to anyone about it. Some people saw signs while they were courting but it is possible that some others did not imagine that their spouses would abuse or hurt them. They are in a state of confusion because they are helpless.
Please if you find yourself in such situation, it might be hard but you need to run for your life. The truth is that abuse is deep and even though it may seem like physical abuse only, it begins to eat into other parts of your life and will affect you deeply. Your mental health is very important so please be wise!
Considering what others would say is not enough reason to manage or decide to remain in an abusive relationship. You deserve way more than to be treated like trash or an animal so please run for your life.
Personally, I would not advice the lady who asked the question or anyone in her shoes, to remain with such a person. If he can abuse his sister, he can do the same to you except he changes. And you need to be one hundred percent sure that he has totally changed before you consider getting into a relationship with him. But please do not wait there, waiting for him to stop the abuse, run and watch from afar.
Thanks a lot for stopping by and please let us know what you think about this situation.
OneLove,
SomzyBrown.
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