What does physical touch mean? Is it limited to sex or there are other things involved? Physical touch is not limited to sex. As the phrase implies, it has to do with 'touch' which sex is a part of. According to the author, Gary Chapman, research has shown that children who are held, hugged, kissed, develop a healthier emotional life than children who are left for a longer period of time without physical contact. In the same vein, physical touch is a powerful vehicle for communicating marital love.
It is highly important to discover what your spouse's primary love language is so that you're not giving or doing something you think would be appreciated but means nothing to your spouse. If physical touch is your spouse's primary love language then you have to be very creative on how to go about it. Also the best person to ask is your spouse. As little as holding hands in public might seem, this would mean a lot for a spouse whose primary love language is physical touch. Hugging and/or kissing your spouse before they go out could bring them home sooner than you expect and could make their hearts filled with thoughts of you through out the day. Playing with your spouse's hair, face, are also ways to express love if his/her primary love language is physical touch.
Although there are inappropriate ways to touch someone of the opposite sex in our society, for married couples this is determined by the people involved. So you can ask your spouse about the 'touches' that he or she doesn't like. You can also try out new ways to touch him or her and see what comments s/he makes about it. This way you get to know whether such kind of touch is enjoyable or irritating to your spouse.
Physical touch is a powerful love communicator and Gary Chapman says when your spouse (whose primary love language is physical touch) goes through a crisis, nothing is more important than touching or holding as s/he cries or expresses sadness. During such time, s/he might not need you to say anything because your words at that time may mean little but s/he would expect that you touch or hold them and they will appreciate you for this. The author also says that "your tender touches will be remembered long after the crisis has passed but your failure to touch may never be forgotten"
Having discovered that your spouse's primary love language is physical touch, Gary Chapman gives the following recommendation:
1. Hold his/her hands as you walk to the mall or from the mall.
2. While eating together, let your knee or foot drift over and touch your spouse.
3. Tell your spouse how much you love them and gradually give them a hug or a peck. This does not have to lead to the bedroom. Smiles.
4. Initiate a shoulder massage while your spouse is seated. Continue this for about 5 minutes unless your spouse tells you to stop.
5. If you sit together in Church, hold hands while a prayer is being said.
6. Give your spouse a foot massage and continue to other parts of your spouse's body as long as it is pleasurable to your spouse.
7. Run the water in the Jacuzzi but if you don't have one, you can call for a bath and have one with your spouse.
8. While you drive, you can touch certain parts of your spouse's body.
9. Touch your spouse in the presence of visiting friends and relatives. It could be a hug, putting your arm around his/her shoulder. It just shows that despite the people around, you still see him/her.
10. When your spouse gets home, meet him or her at the door, outside, garage, street and give him/her a big hug.
Thank you so much for stopping by and we look forward to seeing you next week by God's grace.
OneLove,
SomzyBrown.
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