Sharon: Ruth, I don't feel loved anymore and I don't really know what's happening. Charles used to be in my space a lot when this relationship started and sincerely speaking, I enjoyed every bit of it. Now he seems so busy and I don't understand why I cannot cope with that. I know he loves me but I can't seem to enjoy my life without him being around. I don't know if this is because I have gotten too used to him.
Ruth: Sharon, I understand you. I don't think anyone should be too busy for their partner but could it be that you are feeling this way because you haven't been as busy as you used to be? Being in a relationship is cool but you need to get to the point where you are also comfortable with being around yourself because the truth is that your partner would not always be around you. It is not also wise to let your happiness or joy be dependent on his presence. It is okay to miss him and look forward to spending time with him but please you need to build your own circle and be full of life whether or not he is around.
Sharon: Hmmmm this makes a lot of sense but that's really hard, especially if it is something you are not used to. I understand the importance of building your own circle but how do you do this when you are so used to being around someone that his absence almost makes you go nuts?
Ruth: Good question Sharon. I used to be like that a long time ago. I know I have been in many relationships that you know about but I learnt this lesson really late. For a long time, I thought that I could not be happy without a man and this led to me getting into different relationships. I thought that the only way I could derive joy and satisfaction was by being with these guys or men. I enjoyed some of the relationships but I certainly have regrets over some of them.
There was a particular guy who made me feel worthless. I think he got to know that I loved him so much and couldn't do without him so he capitalised on that. He said all manner of things to me, he abused me physically and mentally that I almost lost my mind. I knew the right thing was to leave him but it was the most difficult thing. He called me all sort of names and I was beginning to believe that I was who he said I was. I couldn't talk to anyone about the things I was going through because we looked so perfect to many people and I wasn't ready to be ridiculed.
Thankfully, aunty Tabitha came visiting one of the days there was an incident with him. She noticed that I was down and asked for what was wrong but I denied that anything was wrong. I tried to pretend that everything was okay but she pressed until I told her everything. She asked me to see a Psychiatrist and paid for my session with the Psychiatrist. It was during this session that I realised what the problem was.
To be continued...
Thanks a lot for stopping by, I hope to see you next week. Please keep staying safe and may God heal our Land, amen!.
OneLove,
SomzyBrown.
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