Tuesday 25 September 2018

ASSUMPTION KILLS!

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So I have had the opportunity to speak to people about this and I have heard about the numerous experiences that people have had. I have also had personal experiences in relation to this and I have come to the conclusion that it is highly important to define your relationship or friendship with people (especially the opposite sex).

Assumptions never work in this regards. People's observations do not also work in this area of life. To put it down simply, "I think he likes me, I think he wants to date me" or "I have been watching you both and I think you are meant for each other..." do not work in this system. It might have worked for some people but it is not a safe place to be in.

Never assume that he likes or loves you if he has not said it with his mouth. His expressions and attitude towards you is not enough to make you think that he likes you or that he wants to be in a relationship with you. Sometimes, she might just be genuinely friendly and lovely; he might just be naturally caring and amazing. She might find it too difficult to caution herself when it comes to being nice and caring and you might misinterpret her actions. Your misinterpretation of her action is what leads you to thinking that she is interested in you but this is not always the case. 

Although ladies and guys need to work on these tendencies, you also need to be careful not to think that everyone who is overly nice or caring has an interest in you. There's a reason we have mouths and thank God for phones these days. If you cannot sit down to talk about it, you can chat about it. There is totally nothing wrong in clarifying your assumptions. If after speaking to him or her, you realise that your assumptions had been wrong, it would hurt. It would hurt badly but trust me, this is certainly better than the kind of hurt you would have had to experience later on. 

Never assume! Define your relationships with people not just in your heart but with the words of your mouth to whom it may concern. Please, people have made these mistakes and if you have experienced this before, you will know that it is not a nice place to be in. This is not to say that you should demand a relationship from someone you think might be interested in you. Not at all! Just ensure that you are both on the same page with your friendship or closeness so that neither of you gets carried away with butterflies while the other person is just being him/herself.

One of my brothers once told me something and at the time he told me, I thought he was being too 'extra'. He is a very friendly person and I think he is one of the most friendly and jovial people I have met and because of this friendly nature of his, he had a lot of friends (especially females) and still does. He said "I ensure that I tell all my female friends that we are just friends so that no matter how nice I am to them because I am being myself, they will have the understanding that I am just their friend. I asked why and told him that this would hurt some people especially people who became his friend because they really liked him. He answered in the affirmative and said that one particular lady shouted at him and said "I never thought of dating you" but he explained that he was just trying to be careful. This might sound too much but this saved him from hearing that he had broken some hearts when he in fact was not in a dating relationship with these people.

You might be viewed as being too forward but this is better than getting hurt at a time that it might be too late.

Thanks a lot for stopping by. May God help us all. Have a wonderful week.

OneLove,

SomzyBrown.

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