PAIN, SHAME AND GUILT.

There's so much to say yet so little to explain. So much has happened to me within this short period of my life than even some older people. I mean where do I start from? Is it from the abuse I experienced by my own father? Strange right? Well, maybe not so strange. My blood father took advantage of me when he was supposed to be the one person that protected me from any form of abuse. Yes, I mean my biological father, not my stepfather...

I had no clue what was going on cos I was really young and naive. I couldn't talk to my mum about it because she always went on about how much she loved and trusted her husband. Was I going to be the one to destroy her 'sweet' marriage? Oh no! I wasn't going to do that. 

My dad would casually call me to his room especially when he knew mum was busy in the kitchen and would touch different parts of my body especially my private part. He would have sex with me and what not.  The first time this happened, it was extremely painful and I became so withdrawn. My mum noticed and would ask for why I had suddenly become a quiet girl but I couldn't say a word.

I went from being at the top of my class to nearly missing the last position in my class. This wasn't funny at all. The saddest part of this was that I'll get beaten by the one person that was behind my failure. He'll beat me and call me all sort of names but still come for my body. Sad right?

My poor and innocent mother noticed that my father was fond of me and she was happy that he was close to his first daughter. She even got worried that my dad wasn't as close to my other Siblings as he was to me. God forbid! Thank God he wasn't trying any rubbish with them at least so I thought.

To be continued...

Thank you so much for stopping by, we hope to see you soon.

OneLove,

SomzyBrown